We set off after breakfast for Lucy and Geri’s wedding, a wedding that had been a year in the planning and so much anticipated and looked forward to. They organised and planned it all themselves with the help of a wedding planner in Hungary who helped locate suppliers in-country and managed the preparation and running of the actual day. Lucy’s wedding planner was the lovely Alida Szilfai. She was fantastic and they clicked from the word go. Highly recommended! Www.alidawedding.com All the details though, both tiny and large, were the result of huge amounts of thought, research and loving care by the couple themselves. It really showed and it made a difference.
I’d booked a car to take us all to the car hire place near the airport and that worked well. The car pickup went smoothly enough. We had a problem because they required a credit card in Bob’s name and he only had his digital cards on watch and phone. I had all mine but as Bob was the booker, mine were no good. We sorted it but something to not ever forget again.
The journey to Polany, the wedding venue, south of Lake Balaton took about two hours. Once clear of Budapest, we were in open country, quite flat at first, great plains of corn and grass. It was motorway all the way and the roads were very good, no potholes here!!! After about 90 minutes we began to see the hills and slopes of the winelands around the lake and then the lake itself in the distance, huge, long and wide. Once we turned south towards Polany, the road became more rural, with small farms and cottages on either side. Polany itself is a hamlet, hilly with vineyards all around and country houses of all sizes. An extremely rural area.
Baberliget Curia is a lovely old white country house with large grounds all around it running down to the vines. There are about 10 en suite guest rooms plus the bridal suite, a very large sitting room, library, dining room and entrance drawing room. To one side is a covered lunch area. The rear of the house opens out onto a paved courtyard with an avenue of large trees from the front doors, across the garden, terraces on two sides, and a swimming pool tucked around the corner. There’s a huge permanent marquee style building further down in the grounds. Perfect location for the wedding.
We arrived at about 1130 and massive hugs all round with Lucy and Geri, who showed us around and then we unpacked. All the rooms were nice – rustic and shabby chic – and very comfy, good bathrooms, insane water pressure. The kids had arranged a lovely buffet lunch for everyone staying at Baberliget and also at the guest accommodation across the lane. Baberliget is rightly praised for the quality of their food. Everything we ate there was just delicious. There were rolling arrivals all afternoon. The bridesmaids and their little families – adorable babies and small ones – were staying at Baberliget as were Pen and Dave. Stuart, Fi, Sheena and Dave were across the road, others were at rentals in the village. A very large group were at another country house about 35 minutes drive away. Somogy Garden Holiday Village (somogykertje.hu) It was particularly nice to see the girls and young men we have known – some of them – since they were children with their children.
We had a rehearsal at 4pm, just the procession and timings for that. We all felt a lot better and clearer after that. The wedding planner was very good.
The wedding weekend really kicked off at 630 when everyone not staying at Somogy Kertje headed off there for the Goulash Party. It’s a very rural, natural resort and our party was around the woodland kitchen where great cauldrons of goulash were boiling and bubbling away. Nearly everyone of the 130 odd guests were there and it was a great catch up, celebration night. Lucy is particularly excellent at keeping her various networks of friends close and in touch.. So she had her school friends – bridesmaids mostly – with their families, university friends, friends from her BP graduate scheme years, foodgoblin friends, Dubai friends, London friends…. then Geri likewise had friends from London, Germany and Hungary including his childhood friends who were groomsmen and of course his family members. Bob and I know lots of the friends very well too as they were always in and out of our house as Lucy was growing up and in her 20s….. it was wonderful to see them all again and she was very touched that some had travelled so far. 2 friends had flown in from Australia, 2 from the USA, 1 from Singapore, several from Dubai….. a real tribute to how loved they both are.
We scoffed goulash, drank wine and champagne and just had a thoroughly lovely time, turned back to Baberliget about 1130 and crashed out….
The wedding morning dawned sunny and hot…. forecast to be about 32C. Had breakfast – amazing hot and cold spread – and then found Lu in her Bride dressing gown out in the avenue of trees watching the decorations beginning. An army had descended on Baberliget under the direction of the amazing wedding planner and were putting out 150 chairs on either side of the aisle, florists decorating the wedding arch and the aisle itself. Staff laying up the tables in the marquee and decorating in there. Lucy had planned in minute detail and there were lots of thoughtful gestures she’d had shipped to Hungary or produced there. Baskets with things like suncream, Panadol, hairclips, aftersun, bug repellant, tampons etc left in reception; little present baskets for the flower girls that had tiny silk pjs, funky sunglasses, children’s perfume spray, little toys; individually named straw baskets for the bridesmaids with satin bathrobes, individualised slippers, face masks, eye masks, perfume etc ; table favours – tiny bottles of homemade polinka, the local fire water, matches, little beeswax candles and dishes, hand fans. In a little copse near the pool she’d set up a children’s camp with tiny tents and sleeping cushions and mats, games and books for them…… her planning was amazing.
At 11am the hairdressers and make up ladies descended to ensure everyone looked their best. Hair first for all the bridesmaids, Geri’s mum Viktoria and then make up for everyone plus me. My hair is short and well cut, I don’t need any help with it.
During that time Lu had devised a treasure hunt for Geri to help keep him from getting too nervous. There were about 6 stops on it where he had to follow clues set out in little envelopes, helped by the bridesmaids and groomsmen, when they were free , and finding a photo of them both, a love letter from Lu, her present to him which was a lovely watch and finally he found Bob, Daisy and I amongst the vines waiting to give him our present. The above pix are Bryony and Erin telling Geri about it and setting him off on his first step. Lucy watching from above.
When Bob and I were first married, at Christmas I made him a little treasure hunt which ended at the tree and there I had hung his present in plain view but which had gone un noticed amongst the baubles. It was a coin – a piece of eight from the underwater Spanish treasure ship, the Atocha, mounted and hung on a chain. Since then it has become a family tradition and we all have one that means something special to us. We had got one for Geri: a silver tetradrachm coin with the image of Alexander the Great,minted in Alexander’s lifetime in 325 BC and on a gold chain. Lucy has a tetradrachm too. Her’s is from the period of classical Athens – around 445BC but it was a nice linkage between them and Geri LOVES Alexander the Great. There were tears and hugs all around as we hung it round his neck and welcomed him to our family in yet another way. A very lovely moment. Lucy had arranged that stop so she could peep unobserved from an upper window. Sadly no pictures of this except in my mind! There were tears all round though. Happy ones!!
The hours ticked by. We were beautified, got dressed in our finery, and then at about 315, Daisy and I began to dress Lu in her beautiful dress. She had it made for her in Mirror Mirror in London and it was a heavily modified Pronovias dress. Made of ivory Mikado silk, just plain but with a beautiful shimmer, with a long train and a Victorian scoop neck with drop sleeves. The whole bodice was bespoke and based on another dress she had tried on at Sassi Holford’s boutique in the Fulham Road. It was intricately and very tightly fitted to her body and I was quite anxious about fastening it. It took another bridesmaid to help us. Not because it was too tight but because it was just tight enough that the zip needed to be literally centimetred up, not inched up. I was so relieved when it finally reached the top!!!!! Her veil had been specially made by a lady in Kent and that too was very long – Cathedral length, with embroidery and decoration all around the bottom. It was funny. I had to burrow under the layers and layers of petticoats to get her shoes on, because she had to put them on after the dress but then couldn’t sit down for fear of creasing it. I was almost lost in there.
At 4 the wedding planner came for us and brought the rest of the bridesmaids, that was a first special moment, when they saw her and she saw them. Their dresses were in a light sage/mint green and all the same material and colour but they had chosen different styles. A great idea which means they will be able to wear them again, the dresses are to their taste and to their body shape. Which meant they all felt good and liked them. They looked fabulous and they all loved Lucy’s dress. They went downstairs and then we had the special moment when Bob knocked and I opened the door to him and he saw Lucy there in all her beauty. He absolutely sobbed and I had to tissue them both. Then I went down. Geri and the groomsmen were already waiting at the arch. All the guests were in place and my arrival at the front pew was the signal to the Celebrant that everyone was ready just inside the mansion. It was lovely to walk down the aisle in my finery lol and know it was all about to start. I will add the photos for all of this later because it was strictly no phones in the service itself.
The string quartet began to play and it began. They played Bittersweet Melody, the Verve song. The 2 little flower girls first, scattering rose petals from their little baskets on the already petal strewn path….. they did so very well with such a big nervousmaking crowd watching them – they were brilliant – then, the bridesmaids one by one – there were 5 – and then a pause and the music changed to “I can’t help falling in love with you” and Lucy and Bob appeared and began their slow walk- a very emotional sight. I think everyone teared up. At a signal from the Celebrant, Geri had turned around, so that he had that once in a lifetime view of Lu coming down the aisle towards him. Everyone was in tears… It was lovely. She looked absolutely radiant and Bob was the proudest man ever, literally bursting with pride.
The service was non religious. The Celebrant read words that Geri and Lucy had prepared, about themselves, their families and how they met, words of advice for them, in both languages but mostly in English. Then there were 3 readings. 2 in English, 1 in Hungarian. I did the last one which was a poem by the young American poet, Whitney Hanson, called “A Wedding Poem”. I had learned it by heart so that I could say it directly to them. Here it is:
They say that often Love starts with a spark.
And maybe that’s true.
But if I were to wish you a love, I wouldn’t wish fire for you.
You see, fire is powerful. But it burns bright, then it’s gone . It’s beautiful and warm, but it doesn’t last long.
So, instead of wishing you a love that burns, I wish you love like a river…. that twists and turns.. It changes and it flows.
It’s powerful and free. But it consistently finds its way back to the sea.
And so…. like the water,
I hope your love is ever changing, ever growing. I hope your love is powerful and free.
And may you always find each other. Like the river finds the sea.
They then individually said their vows to each other. I don’t know how they got through them! Talk about love and emotions and promises all laid out for us all to hear and witness…… it was so moving, so emotional, tributes to family and remembered loved ones – Geri lost his beloved father 15 years ago….. promises made, they exchanged their rings and were declared man and wife.
Then – a surprise – the Celebrant read another piece from them both in which they paid great tribute to their parents and their upbringing which had made them the strong, brave loving couple they are, and had given them a wonderful living embodiments of a loving relationship – more t ears – and we were presented with a bottle of Tokai for Bob, and flowers for Viktoria and myself. A treasured moment.
Finally they processed out, photos taken of course and the video, then the bridesmaids and groomsmen and all of the rest of us. We made a long double line of guests to the mansion and threw white rose petals in the air as Lucy and Geri walked arm in arm back to the mansion. A lovely sight.
Then, we gathered on the terraces and drank champagne and ate canapes whilst Lucy and Geri were summoned for photographs followed by groupings of everyone else. Can’t wait to see the photos. I wasn’t drinking anything – I think I had one glass of champagne and one canape – because my mind was on having to gather Lucy’s amazing train up into its “bustle” for their entry into the marquee as man and wife. I’d practised it once at Mirror Mirror but it was quite intricate…. well… amazingly intricate actually, involving clear poppers, and tiny ribbons and eyes sewn into the underskirts and the underneath of the top layer of the dress….. I just knew that I had to be clear headed and steady handed to get it done. Terrifying!
I helped her take the veil off and then later we went up to her room and Daisy and I got the bustle done. It’s just a way that the train gets drawn up into the back of the dress skirt so that it makes a round rear, rather than having a train dragging along the ground for dancing. I must say it went so smoothly, all my fears were unfounded and in fact it looked great! Daisy and I were very relieved and in equal measure, very astonished! We decide to hurry off and have a glass of champagne to celebrate!
Lucy did the traditional bouquet throw across the terrace! George caught it with a giant leap! So maybe it will be a lucky year for him!
Everyone was gathered in the marquee and the Celebrant announced the arrival of Mr & Mrs Boler-Toth which is going to be their new surnames – an amalgamation of their current names. We are delighted Boler is being carried forward from our strand of the family. They followed the Hungarian tradition for the entry where all the guests wave their napkins in the air, stamp their feet and cheer and the couple sort of dance in to a particular piece of music. Huge fun.
Once seated, we had two speeches. Geri went first where he have his thanks to all the different groups of people who had made the day possible and had given of themselves to be there and make it special. Then he talked about the importance of family and referenced first Lucy’s upbringing and her relationships with each of her 4 grandparents, now all passed but whom she had known either for a short or for a very long time, of course her relationship with Daisy and with ourselves; he talked about his own grandparents, his very close loving relationship with his father and also his mother and how she had had to step up as a result of his dad’s illness and death….. his sister and brothers…. It was again very emotional and their were tears around the tables. Finally it was Bob’s turn and he spoke about Lucy, the milestones we have shared with her, some funny stories about her strengths and weaknesses, about Geri and how he had come down to ask Bob;s permission to propose and how much that had meant to him. It was a funny speech and a very good one. They both did well.
Speeches out of the way….. everyone could relax and enjoy dinner, an excellent 3 course affair. I remember starting with a goats cheese salad, then I had duck breast in a lovely reduced sauce with vegetables and then a chocolate brownie. Dinner finished, some tables were cleared and the band came on – quite a large group with a brass section as well as guitars, drums and violins. They were absolutely great and we all joined in some hours of energetic dancing. Lucy and Geri did their first dance which was lovely.
At about 11pm, there was another Hungarian tradition when a group of the men “kidnapped” the bride and carried her off!!!!! 3 proofs of capture were brought to Geri: her bracelet, an ear ring and….. something else… can’t remember. He had to choose 2 helpers and between them they had to do challenges to regain the items and ultimately, Lucy. It was very amusing and naturally he was successful and she was returned unscathed.
There was a fabulous multi tier multi flavour cake, ceremoniously cut! One layer was sachertorte and it was the best ever.
There was also a traditional dance where each of them were lifted onto the shoulders of a couple of the guests and we all danced around them and with the poor pack mules. About midnight Lucy went off to get changed into – another Hungarian tradition – a red dress. Rather a sexy number with a fitted corset top!!!! I’m not sure about all the symbolism of the kidnap, return, swapping a white dress for a red dress… but…. it was good fun. Langos, a sort of Hungarian pizza came out at about 1am. It looked lovely but too late for me….
The dancing went on till about 3am at which point we all trooped outside, made a long avenue towards the house and were each given giant sparklers. They were lit, and Lucy and Geri danced down the sparkler arched avenue back to the mansion, followed closely by the lone saxophonist playing “Baker Street”.
They disappeared off to the bridal suite and the party slowly broke up around 330. Fell into bed and had at least 3 hours sleep…….
It would have been nice to lie on…. but no… breakfast called and more festivities. This time a Sunday poolside brunch party. Most people were still around and came to Baberliget. Lots of fun in and around the swimming pool and the shade of the trees. It was even hotter – 34C. The water was a very welcome relief. Brunch was served at 2pm and then the farewells started as group by group guests started on their journeys home. The enthusiasm for the weekend was huge. I can honestly say everyone had the best time ever and Lucy and Geri thoroughly deserved all the praise and thanks they got for such a fantastic time. It was wonderful to be part of such a diverse and wonderful group of mainly young people. Had a great, great time
Our final activity was a lovely group dinner for the 40 or so last men standing who were staying over on the Sunday night. A great long table was set down the avenue of trees where the wedding had taken place, and we enjoyed a last excellent Baberliget dinner and some last toasts and talk….. The flowers were absolutely beautiful. Gorgeous colours and beautiful displays. I took some final pictures around the gardens.
This morning…. absolutely exhausted we had a family breakfast and then Geri’s family headed back to Budapest, Lucy, Geri and Daisy headed to Viktoria’s house to switch suitcases, and — in a nice last touch – they took all the large flower displays to place on and around Geri’s dad’s grave. Then off to the airport, Daisy to fly home, and Lucy and Geri off on honeymoon to the Far East.
Stuart and Fi, Penny and David, Bob and I loaded into two cars and drove up and around the lake to our hotels in the Badacsonytomaj area. It looks particularly lovely here, on the edge of the lake with vine covered hills around and behind us. It was really too hot and too late, and we were too tired to do more than grab some dinner tonight, but tomorrow we begin to explore.
This was one of the greatest weekends of our lives and one we will never forget. A most amazing, emotional and joyous time with a super group of people. Baberliget was wonderful and a perfect venue. The staff literally could not do enough for us to make it perfect and they succeeded.